Floral Dress

I need to start this post off by saying, I love blogging. Writing the post, arranging the pictures in a way that is most flattering, and sharing the post with everyone is so fulfilling.  When I started blogging back in the summer of 2016, June to be exact, I was supper excited, optimistic, and full of energy.

I didn’t start doing it as a hobby..I had clear intentions on growing this thing I loved, into a full fledged business. What I didn’t know was how difficult it would be for me, as I navigated the terrain of a full time job, family issues, and most of all, my fluctuating hormones.

The first year or so was pretty easy breezy, but the last eight or so months, have been a real struggle. I wish I could blame it all on being menopausal, but I know me, and I choose to be honest with myself these days. Although the hormones play a big part in how I’m handling life issues, my behavioral patterns do also.

See my MO in the past has been to shut down at the first signs of  life resistance, sulk, and go into recluse mode. I would sit around and constantly focus on what was wrong…spiraling into a vicious cycle..ushering in more of the same.

Floral Dress

Floral Dress

For the first few months of the year, I was constantly questioning my ability to do this thing. I was questioning my stamina, my patience, and my loyalty. Every time I experienced any disappointment from family members, coworkers, friends, and or fellow bloggers, I wanted to through in the towel. It was starting to feel like my life was falling apart, and I couldn’t get a grip on it.. like I was just circling the drain.

The only real relief I would find was in the planning of a vacation, and getting away. Traveling has always been my refuge, ever since I can remember. The only issue is, I can’t stay in a constant state of wanderlust, well at least not at the present moment. I also know I can’t run away every time things get tough. I want my travels to be all about embracing adventure, discovering new places, and new things about myself.  My journeys should be about just that..the journey, not an escape mechanism.

Travel should be therapeutic, but not a therapy session, or the therapist, if that makes any sense…it does to me. Which leads me to share, therapy is definitely something I will be seeking on my new path, to not just feeling better, but being better. It’s that elephant in the room that most don’t want to talk about. I’ve learnt over the years that there’s absolutely nothing wrong with admitting that we need help. I’m tired of trying to do this thing all by myself. Blogging, and life in general, can become a bit overwhelming.

I’m in a really good place now, and my goal is to continue to grow. Balance is everything. Although this journey has been a bit difficult, I know that it’s a part of Gods plan. A plan of growth and prosperity. I’m just so happy that I have this platform to share my good, bad and ugly parts. My hope is that it will inspire someone else to keep pushing..to nurture themselves and their dreams.

If this post resonates with you, if you need somewhere to share your feelings..drop your thoughts below. Or you can always email me, at [email protected]. Also feel free to DM me on Instagram @squarepearls. We can do this together.

xoxo

Photo: @dadouchic

Until our next encounter love..as always, stay inspired

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